Wednesday, July 11, 2007

Wageningen Last Days Allison

So, it is my last real day here in Wageningen. It is really hard to believe that we are done. My roommates for next year are starting to talk about school again, and I don't really feel like it has even been summer yet. This could be due to the weather, but I think it is just because time flew by here.

After careful consideration, I have come up with three things that I see different in myself.

The first, is learning the ability to approach people and just start a conversation. I hadn't really forced myself to do that in a long time, but coming here and knowing no one, I think it is something that we have all had to relearn. If I hadn't done this, I don't think I would have met the people I did, and a lot of opportunities would have been lost. It helps that the Dutch are generally friendly people who are willing to make new friends. Back home, I sit in class with the same people every week for a semester, and for some reason, never say a word to them. It is strange how people can be so close to people and never actually meet them. It is an attitude where someone thinks because they already have made friends, new ones are unecessary. I hope to not fall back into this habit again when I get home.

The next thing would be allowing myself to take part. I have had many shadowing experiences in the past, and in all of them, I just stood back and watched most of the time. I expected the same here, but the physiology team was willing to show me how. Before I knew it, I was helping out. I was worried at first that I might mess something up because it was my first time and this was real research, but after a few days, it became just like a job for me, and I am really grateful that I was able to take part. I never would have learned as much from just standing and watching.

The final thing I have noticed about myself is something I didn't really notice at all until it was pointed out to me last weekend. I am not afraid anymore. I used to worry about traveling, living alone, and even walking at night. I have gained so much independence here and met so many great people leading lives that I now want to mimic. I really don't mind traveling alone now. I have really gained faith in people, and I understand that bad things do happen, but I can't let myself go on in fear of them or else I will lose out on a lot of great experiences. This is not to say that I will put myself in dangerous situations or that I will not be careful when meeting people, only that I feel like a stronger person.

This program has been wonderful, and I am so glad that I applied. I hope that everything I did and saw here will be useful for others in the future.

I am glad to be heading home soon to see my family and friends, but I will miss Europe and the new friends I have made.